Spring Has Sprung

Duckies!!!
Oh my stars it has been forever and an eternity since we've last encountered each other's sexiness.  It has been exactly a month since my last post and I sincerely apologize for the long-time coming.

The reason I've been gone so long is I've been remodeling my room.  I know you're asking yourself, "Well what the fcuk does that have to do with uploading new posts?"  Well duckies, my room is pretty much the room of multimedia: the WI-FI connection is in my room and the house phone as well.  And since my room needed a complete overhaul, everything needed to be taken out.

I used to have carpet, now I have hardwood flooring.  My room used to be powder blue and white, now it's purple (plum) with grey (dolphin fin) trimming.

(I am not making these colors up. Behr paint actually labeled these as the colors.)

Anyway, the contrast of the deep purple and grey trimming gives so much vibrancy to my room.  In addition to the new flooring and paint-job, I also acquired some new furniture.  I'm in the process of getting a new bed.  If you can believe it I've actually been living on a spring Twin-sized mattress for several years now.  Not the Twin-XL mattresses that college dorms have but something a bit smaller.

Ergo, I am upgrading to a Full-sized memory foam mattress.  I cannot wait to get my new bed.  I had a memory foam mattress topper/pad on my previous bed and that was the most enjoyable part.  Now when I get an actual bed made entirely out of the pad I had...I will never leave my bed.

I'm also making a galvanized trashcan into an industrial coffee table for my room.  I'm going to flip the lid over and use adhesive to hold it in place, and I'm going to place Plexi-glass over the upturned lid to make into a table.  Creative right?!  I will post pictures of my room as soon as everything is in place.  I promise.

The picture of that sexy man in bed (above) reminded me of something.  Recently I've been really hooked on Andrew Christian underwear.  What?!  You've never heard of Andrew Christian underwear?  Well unless you're gay I wouldn't be surprised.  Andrew Christian is an American designer that specializes in creating sexy underwear for men.  He also sells streetwear and other pieces...but his underwear are timeless pieces themselves.  Whenever my check comes in I immediately go to AndrewChristianshop.com and pick up a few new pairs.  I only have about eight pairs but I love them.  I just got some new ones today and I can't wait to shake my ass in them.

(Some of the sexy garments are what I call "sexually-able," meaning you don't even need to take them off for certain bedding activities.)

In other news, work has just been fantastic.  I'm in charge of about 20+ wedding registries now and I'm starting to get a better grip on what makes a registry special and well-rounded.  This past weekend one of my couples even bought me an iced coffee from Starbucks.  And to top it off when they got home they emailed the company, telling them I went above and beyond my job at making them feel welcome and provided outstanding customer service.

When I came into work all the supervisors that saw me congratulated me on my compliment.  One of my co-workers, who was also mentioned in the email as well, printed out the email with the compliment...AND AT THE TOP THE REGIONAL MANAGER OF MANHATTAN EVEN COMMENTED ON IT!

I met her before.  She was actually one of the people that interviewed me for the job.  But to actually see that she complimented me on top of my couple's compliment made it even better. I feel fabulous!

I've been trying to revamp my music and Fall Out Boy's "Save Rock and Roll" and Brian Slade's "Dawn O' the Unicorn" have been lodged in my ears as of recent.

I haven't really liked Fall Out Boy's music since their 2007 release of "Infinity on High."  But once again they have found their way to make me lip-sync their lyrics while I'm waiting for the train.  With their hardcore opening song "The Phoenix" I was captivated and instantly enticed by their cool, yet angst-filled vocals.  Courtney Love, Elton John, Big Sean, and others are featured on some of their tracks and it doesn't feel forced at all.  Fall Out Boy is back and kicking ass more than ever.

I know I'm like three years late but I know it now.  Brian Slade (aka B. Slade, aka Tonéx) has got me moving and shaking my ass to his 2010 mixtape "Dawn O' the Unicorn."  My absolute favorite song on this mixtape, thus far, is "Get Over You (Extended Ballroom Mix)." I literally heard this song yesterday, thanks to my dear friend Jessie, and I cannot stop playing it.  It makes me wanna prance and do a hair-flip.

I just feel so gay when I hear that song, like a should be in a musical or an Andrew Christian video.

Besides that everything has been pretty awesome on this end.  I've seen "Pain & Gain," via the Internet.  (Don't judge me.)

I thought the film was going to be incredibly stupid...but I was extremely mistaken.  I haven't laughed so hard during a movie since "EVIL DEAD."  There are some quotes that still make me giggle if I think too hard about them.  If I recite them among friends, it takes me awhile to get through them.  This movie is a great watch.

In addition, I went to see "Iron Man 3" in theaters with my parents, a couple weeks ago.

But get this...we went to a theater called Cinema Suites in West Orange, NJ where you watched the movie and people came and served you actual food.  I'm not talking hot dogs and popcorn.  I mean they had cocktails, steaks, seafood, Asian cuisine, Mexican cuisine, comfort food, burgers, the whole-fucking-nine-yards!  And you sat in these red plush leather reclining seats that had buttons on the side of them to beckon your server!  It felt like I was in a business class flight, without the fear of plunging to my death at any moment.

I knew this film was going to be incredible because of the amazing trailers.  When I first saw the trailer in the theaters, I believe I was seeing "The Great & Powerful Oz."  I actually teared-up when I saw the trailer.  I did the same at certain parts in the movie too.  But to those who haven't seen it, go and see it.  "Iron Man 3" is hilarious and action-packed.  I didn't expect it to be so funny but there were so many moments where I had to compose myself.  Stay after the credits.  There's a funny little bit at the end.

OH! Speaking of composing myself Beyoncé's song "Grown Woman" has recently been leaked and it just came on as I was blogging and I had to take a minute to choreograph it. It makes me want to shake my ass until I pass out.

(I wouldn't mind waking up to that every morning!)

Speaking of waking up every morning to something, I have been talking to this guy for like close to two weeks now.  I met him online.  Yes, I said it.  Duckies, I have been an online boy for quite sometime now and I've met a few good guys on there.  (I've met plenty of beautiful cocks and masterpiece asses as well.)  But overall the guys online are just raging homosexuals with self-esteem issues, diseases, and/or are mentally-unstable.

I admit, we all have needs.  Sometimes mine seem insatiable and I'll randomly hookup with a guy.  But after I cum I'm just like "Oh God, why did I sleep with this monster?"  But really I'm one too during my moments of weakness.  (This is why I've invested in a sex toy.  I've had a Fleshlight since last September and it has kept me home more times than I've gotten "take-out."  If you're a man and you don't know what a Fleshlight is, go look it up.  It's fucking amazing, literally LOL).

Anyway, back to this dude.

I know it's kind of early to predict any kind of future with this dude but I actually see something blossoming with him, whether it's a lifetime friendship or my soulmate.  (I'm not gonna let him see this because I don't want him to know that I'm feeling him so already.  Let's meet first and then we'll go from there.  Wish me luck duckies!)

Speaking of soulmates, the dude I'm talking to told me about this dog quiz I could take on AnimalPlanet.com to see what dog I'm most compatible with.  I did my research, in addition to taking the quiz, and I'm going to start looking for breeders/shelters that specialize in Pembroke Welsh Corgis.

Look at how fucking adorable this little creature is!!!

It's a medium dog and it loves to run around and it loves playing.  But what really sold me on this particular breed is the fact that it's a herding dog and if left around little children, it will herd them like cattle.  How funny is that?!  Just picturing this little dog nipping at the heels of babies makes me want to hug and spoil it.

So once I get my bed and then my phone, I'm going to get a Pembroke Welsh Corgi puppy and make him my canine soulmate.

I think I've filled you with enough of my life for one post because that's pretty much all I have to say.  Let's get to the Word of the Week, which I must give credit to my friend Stephen for making me laugh at this one.

Relationshit (pronounced ree-lay-shun-shh-et): a mutual bond between two or more people that has made a turn for the worse; an undesirable relationship that has gone through terrible circumstances and situations; when a bitch doesn't know when to let go!

Example: "In the beginning my husband and I loved each other so much.  But after fifteen years of marriage, our bond has boiled down to an ugly relationshit.

Time for some "Words of Wisdom."

"Even though the path may be dark, use your own light to see your way through.  Although others may try to hinder you from your goal you must look deep within yourself to carry on.  And remember, no one knows you better than yourself.  Keep on pushing."

Okay my loves, I think that'll do for today.  I promise to keep you posted since my room is back in action.  My schedule is never set in stone and I used to be off on Mondays but that changed so I will give you a heads-up on FaceBook days in advance, to let you know when I'll be posting, week by week.  If you don't have my FaceBook link here it is: facebook.com/antoine.gardner9.

I love you for reading.  Have a fabulous week duckies!

-Gabriel Anderson

Evil Laughter

How's it going my darling duckies? I hope know everything is smashing on your end.  This past week has been so fun that...I can hardly remember it actually LOL.  I guess I had too much fun partying and laughing.

Speaking of laughing, I saw "EVIL DEAD" this past Thursday with my friend Jessie.  I thought I was gonna be scared shitless after seeing it, like how I was after seeing "Insidious," (which still scares me.)*

*(Even while posting this picture and writing on it I can't look at that demon without shaking.  If you wanna be scared, watch "Insidious.")

Anywho, back to what I was saying...oh right!  

"EVIL DEAD" is probably one of the funniest horror movies I've ever seen.  There were times in the movie where I would be laughing so loud and abruptly that I would have been embarrassed...if I hadn't been buzzed/well-and-tipsy at the time.  (I'll go more into that later.)

OMG! I just invented a Word of the Week on the spot.

Well-and-tipsy aka W.A.T. (prononucned whel-aend-tehp-see): intoxicated on a functional level; buzzed; a little drunk

Example: "Mom get off my back.  I only had like four beers.  I'm just well-and-tipsy."

(Okay back to the movie!)

There was this one line in the movie where I couldn't stop laughing for a good four minutes: I'm not exaggerating in the least.  For those who have seen the movie I'm referring to the part where--I won't give away too much detailing for those who haven't seen it but want to--the brother was looking down and talking to his possessed sister.  One of the lines she said to him was hilarious.  There was a point where I couldn't breathe and I was crying because the line was just that funny.  Reciting it aloud, even now, makes me giggle.  I was laughing for so long that people were laughing at me because I couldn't stop laughing.  I seriously had to compose myself in order to pay attention to the rest of the movie.

Even though there are some very scary and jumpy parts in the movie, I found it to be the funniest (serious) horror movie I've ever seen.  I can't wait to get it on DVD.

To rewind a bit, before Jessie and I went to see "EVIL DEAD" she and I went out to get a bite to eat and to get some drinks.  We stopped at this cute Thai and Asian restaurant called Cafetasia, in Greenwich Village for their wonderful happy hour special.  Jessie and I had been there before, but on separate occasions.  Jessie introduced me to her favorite dish: the Crispy Fillet of Flounder.  Oh my sweet baby Jesus in a onesie!

The fish was so fresh that I swear they just caught it right when I ordered the flounder.  It was so much food too that I couldn't even finish it.  And it was only $12!  In addition to our lovely meal, we had a few drinks and we got this thing called a "Rainbow Shot."

Isn't it so pretty?!

Then after dinner we went to watch "EVIL DEAD."  Then we went to Jessie's house, where our friend Tess met us.  We basically hung out and laughed some more.  I tried showing them Louis C.K.'s comedy stand-up special "Oh My God," but the connection to HBO GO was more like HBO-OH-HELL-NO!

The next day, Friday, I went to work and had a fabulous time as usual.  I had my first same-sex couple and it was an absolute honor to help them.  Having the right to marry the one you love, in the face of oppression and ignorance, is a very brave and empowering act.  I wish you both well and I look forward to having you two come back.

That night my school, University of Hartford, was throwing an event at SideBar down in Union Square in the city; which happens to be less than 10 blocks away from my job.  So I went there and saw so many of my dear friends from school...and made some new ones too.  We drank and chatted about our new lives post-Hartford.  

Oh!  While we were at the bar they were about to catch the second suspect in the Boston marathon bombing and when they found him the bar started screaming and applauding.  Then I knew it was chance to start a chant.  So I immediately put my fist in the air and started chanting: USA! USA! USA!  And I don't know how but everyone in the bar joined in and it was so unifying and hysterical.

(I can now scratch "Start a USA chant" off my bucket list.)

Following the alumni event the gay alumni and I went to this bar/club/lounge called Therapy in Hell's Kitchen.    I had never been there but I loved it because I wanted to dance.  I danced so hard, dipped so low, popped it, backed it up, "salsa-ed," lip-synced, and turned their little stage into a showcase for my stellar dance moves.  I asked the DJ to play "Single Ladies" because I was in rare form that night but he didn't.  As a consolation he played "Get Me Bodied" and I killed that, even though it had been years since my last performance. LOL So full of myself.

When leaving I ran into my friend Alex, which was so random but delightful all at once.  We chatted for a bit but then I had to head home because I had to nurse a hangover in the morning before work.

Other than that nothing much happened.  Now I feel like I'm 60 because thanks to being a dancehall queen at Therapy my legs are incredibly sore.  Walking down stairs is like dying every two seconds.  I can't go down stairs without squeezing the life out of the banister.  And when I walk I'm sure it looks like I'm smuggling diamonds up my asshole.

But I think I've said enough.  I believe it's time for some Words of Wisdom.

"Common courtesy is not as common as you think.  A simple 'please' or 'thank you' can actually lift the spirits of many.  Respect is earned but cordiality should be a given.  Smile at a stranger.  Hold a door for someone behind you.  Give credit where it's due.  You never know who's watching and how far a little deed can take you."

Okay my loves I gotta go eat and then take everything out of my room.  A contractor is coming this week and is putting down new flooring in my room, as well as replacing my door and threshold.  So much! Grrrrr LOL.

I hope you have a magical week.

I love you for reading.

Stay classy.  Stay sassy.

-Gabriel Anderson