Spring Has Sprung

Duckies!!!
Oh my stars it has been forever and an eternity since we've last encountered each other's sexiness.  It has been exactly a month since my last post and I sincerely apologize for the long-time coming.

The reason I've been gone so long is I've been remodeling my room.  I know you're asking yourself, "Well what the fcuk does that have to do with uploading new posts?"  Well duckies, my room is pretty much the room of multimedia: the WI-FI connection is in my room and the house phone as well.  And since my room needed a complete overhaul, everything needed to be taken out.

I used to have carpet, now I have hardwood flooring.  My room used to be powder blue and white, now it's purple (plum) with grey (dolphin fin) trimming.

(I am not making these colors up. Behr paint actually labeled these as the colors.)

Anyway, the contrast of the deep purple and grey trimming gives so much vibrancy to my room.  In addition to the new flooring and paint-job, I also acquired some new furniture.  I'm in the process of getting a new bed.  If you can believe it I've actually been living on a spring Twin-sized mattress for several years now.  Not the Twin-XL mattresses that college dorms have but something a bit smaller.

Ergo, I am upgrading to a Full-sized memory foam mattress.  I cannot wait to get my new bed.  I had a memory foam mattress topper/pad on my previous bed and that was the most enjoyable part.  Now when I get an actual bed made entirely out of the pad I had...I will never leave my bed.

I'm also making a galvanized trashcan into an industrial coffee table for my room.  I'm going to flip the lid over and use adhesive to hold it in place, and I'm going to place Plexi-glass over the upturned lid to make into a table.  Creative right?!  I will post pictures of my room as soon as everything is in place.  I promise.

The picture of that sexy man in bed (above) reminded me of something.  Recently I've been really hooked on Andrew Christian underwear.  What?!  You've never heard of Andrew Christian underwear?  Well unless you're gay I wouldn't be surprised.  Andrew Christian is an American designer that specializes in creating sexy underwear for men.  He also sells streetwear and other pieces...but his underwear are timeless pieces themselves.  Whenever my check comes in I immediately go to AndrewChristianshop.com and pick up a few new pairs.  I only have about eight pairs but I love them.  I just got some new ones today and I can't wait to shake my ass in them.

(Some of the sexy garments are what I call "sexually-able," meaning you don't even need to take them off for certain bedding activities.)

In other news, work has just been fantastic.  I'm in charge of about 20+ wedding registries now and I'm starting to get a better grip on what makes a registry special and well-rounded.  This past weekend one of my couples even bought me an iced coffee from Starbucks.  And to top it off when they got home they emailed the company, telling them I went above and beyond my job at making them feel welcome and provided outstanding customer service.

When I came into work all the supervisors that saw me congratulated me on my compliment.  One of my co-workers, who was also mentioned in the email as well, printed out the email with the compliment...AND AT THE TOP THE REGIONAL MANAGER OF MANHATTAN EVEN COMMENTED ON IT!

I met her before.  She was actually one of the people that interviewed me for the job.  But to actually see that she complimented me on top of my couple's compliment made it even better. I feel fabulous!

I've been trying to revamp my music and Fall Out Boy's "Save Rock and Roll" and Brian Slade's "Dawn O' the Unicorn" have been lodged in my ears as of recent.

I haven't really liked Fall Out Boy's music since their 2007 release of "Infinity on High."  But once again they have found their way to make me lip-sync their lyrics while I'm waiting for the train.  With their hardcore opening song "The Phoenix" I was captivated and instantly enticed by their cool, yet angst-filled vocals.  Courtney Love, Elton John, Big Sean, and others are featured on some of their tracks and it doesn't feel forced at all.  Fall Out Boy is back and kicking ass more than ever.

I know I'm like three years late but I know it now.  Brian Slade (aka B. Slade, aka Tonéx) has got me moving and shaking my ass to his 2010 mixtape "Dawn O' the Unicorn."  My absolute favorite song on this mixtape, thus far, is "Get Over You (Extended Ballroom Mix)." I literally heard this song yesterday, thanks to my dear friend Jessie, and I cannot stop playing it.  It makes me wanna prance and do a hair-flip.

I just feel so gay when I hear that song, like a should be in a musical or an Andrew Christian video.

Besides that everything has been pretty awesome on this end.  I've seen "Pain & Gain," via the Internet.  (Don't judge me.)

I thought the film was going to be incredibly stupid...but I was extremely mistaken.  I haven't laughed so hard during a movie since "EVIL DEAD."  There are some quotes that still make me giggle if I think too hard about them.  If I recite them among friends, it takes me awhile to get through them.  This movie is a great watch.

In addition, I went to see "Iron Man 3" in theaters with my parents, a couple weeks ago.

But get this...we went to a theater called Cinema Suites in West Orange, NJ where you watched the movie and people came and served you actual food.  I'm not talking hot dogs and popcorn.  I mean they had cocktails, steaks, seafood, Asian cuisine, Mexican cuisine, comfort food, burgers, the whole-fucking-nine-yards!  And you sat in these red plush leather reclining seats that had buttons on the side of them to beckon your server!  It felt like I was in a business class flight, without the fear of plunging to my death at any moment.

I knew this film was going to be incredible because of the amazing trailers.  When I first saw the trailer in the theaters, I believe I was seeing "The Great & Powerful Oz."  I actually teared-up when I saw the trailer.  I did the same at certain parts in the movie too.  But to those who haven't seen it, go and see it.  "Iron Man 3" is hilarious and action-packed.  I didn't expect it to be so funny but there were so many moments where I had to compose myself.  Stay after the credits.  There's a funny little bit at the end.

OH! Speaking of composing myself Beyoncé's song "Grown Woman" has recently been leaked and it just came on as I was blogging and I had to take a minute to choreograph it. It makes me want to shake my ass until I pass out.

(I wouldn't mind waking up to that every morning!)

Speaking of waking up every morning to something, I have been talking to this guy for like close to two weeks now.  I met him online.  Yes, I said it.  Duckies, I have been an online boy for quite sometime now and I've met a few good guys on there.  (I've met plenty of beautiful cocks and masterpiece asses as well.)  But overall the guys online are just raging homosexuals with self-esteem issues, diseases, and/or are mentally-unstable.

I admit, we all have needs.  Sometimes mine seem insatiable and I'll randomly hookup with a guy.  But after I cum I'm just like "Oh God, why did I sleep with this monster?"  But really I'm one too during my moments of weakness.  (This is why I've invested in a sex toy.  I've had a Fleshlight since last September and it has kept me home more times than I've gotten "take-out."  If you're a man and you don't know what a Fleshlight is, go look it up.  It's fucking amazing, literally LOL).

Anyway, back to this dude.

I know it's kind of early to predict any kind of future with this dude but I actually see something blossoming with him, whether it's a lifetime friendship or my soulmate.  (I'm not gonna let him see this because I don't want him to know that I'm feeling him so already.  Let's meet first and then we'll go from there.  Wish me luck duckies!)

Speaking of soulmates, the dude I'm talking to told me about this dog quiz I could take on AnimalPlanet.com to see what dog I'm most compatible with.  I did my research, in addition to taking the quiz, and I'm going to start looking for breeders/shelters that specialize in Pembroke Welsh Corgis.

Look at how fucking adorable this little creature is!!!

It's a medium dog and it loves to run around and it loves playing.  But what really sold me on this particular breed is the fact that it's a herding dog and if left around little children, it will herd them like cattle.  How funny is that?!  Just picturing this little dog nipping at the heels of babies makes me want to hug and spoil it.

So once I get my bed and then my phone, I'm going to get a Pembroke Welsh Corgi puppy and make him my canine soulmate.

I think I've filled you with enough of my life for one post because that's pretty much all I have to say.  Let's get to the Word of the Week, which I must give credit to my friend Stephen for making me laugh at this one.

Relationshit (pronounced ree-lay-shun-shh-et): a mutual bond between two or more people that has made a turn for the worse; an undesirable relationship that has gone through terrible circumstances and situations; when a bitch doesn't know when to let go!

Example: "In the beginning my husband and I loved each other so much.  But after fifteen years of marriage, our bond has boiled down to an ugly relationshit.

Time for some "Words of Wisdom."

"Even though the path may be dark, use your own light to see your way through.  Although others may try to hinder you from your goal you must look deep within yourself to carry on.  And remember, no one knows you better than yourself.  Keep on pushing."

Okay my loves, I think that'll do for today.  I promise to keep you posted since my room is back in action.  My schedule is never set in stone and I used to be off on Mondays but that changed so I will give you a heads-up on FaceBook days in advance, to let you know when I'll be posting, week by week.  If you don't have my FaceBook link here it is: facebook.com/antoine.gardner9.

I love you for reading.  Have a fabulous week duckies!

-Gabriel Anderson

Dodging Balls

Hey my loves!  I know you all are doing well because life is meant to be lived in happiness, not in strife.  This week has been pretty eventful.  Last week I remember mentioning going to my friend's house to hang out.  We did some adult things--not sex, silly duckies--and we watched episodes of "Family Guy."  The last time I saw them was around my birthday and by birthday I mean the day of my 24th year on Earth, where I was throwing up in an ex-friend's backyard.

Oh yes!  I have dismissed someone of my friendship this week.  I'm not going to lie and say he wasn't a friend to me at certain points...but he has become such a miserable and disrespectful person.  I know that I am not the easiest person to deal with sometimes but this dude was always a downer.  He'd always take things so personal and swore he was some type of gangsta.  I'm sorry but we both we to the same performing arts school from 5th to 12th grade.  If you know pieces by Schubert, Bach, Beethoven  and contemporary composers by heart, you're no one's gangsta.

Plus his lifestyle wasn't much of anything credible and he didn't seem to mind it.  He wasn't trying to better his life.  He would just wallow and smoke away his problems and complain, complain, complain.  So one thing led to another and we got into a verbal altercation via text and we ended our friendship.  Honestly, he was just a decent connect for "okay" weed.  But I do wish him well...

You know the saying, "When one door closes, another one opens?"  Well, it's ridiculous how doors open for me when I close others.  When I got off work this past Saturday my phone was dying but I was trying to call my friends to see if they wanted to hang out.  The few people I did call to hang out didn't pick up.  (Yes if you received a call from me Saturday night and you didn't pick up, you are now a cunt in my book; especially if you haven't returned my call yet.)

Anywho, no one picked up so I decided to head home.  As I was in about to go to the lower level of the train station, I noticed someone's bright neon jacket...and saw that it was my friend Jessie that I haven't seen in close to two years!  She was running for the train and totally didn't even see me so I ran behind her and when I got on the train I tapped her on the shoulder.  She turned around and her face lit up faster than flash cotton in a grease fire!

She couldn't believe it was me and she kept telling me "I'm going to embarrass you on this train!"  I was just so happy to see her that I don't even think I had time to be embarrassed.  I told her I was just getting off work and I told her I wanted to do something...AND SHE INVITED ME OVER!  

We spent the night gossiping, laughing, and just loving each other.  It was magical!

In less than twenty-four hours I got rid of one disrespectful, anger-filled reject and replaced him with an angelic, beautiful, and vivacious lady.

Since we're on the topic of vivacity, I'm gonna tell you what happened to me today.  Well I had to stop by my psychiatrist's office to pick up a prescription--only the best for Gabe--and on my way home a young boy got on the train.  He seemed nice...until he started dribbling/bouncing his basketball on the train.  Everyone was looking at him like he had grown three heads and they had every right.  This little Hispanic kid kept dribbling his ball until he got a seat and then he stopped to eat a gold-wrapped chocolate coin. (Yes I just pulled out the race umbrella, but remember I did talk about those bad-ass black kids last week.)

I thought his antics were over but after resting and stuffing his face with his gold-wrapped chocolate coin, he cringes up the foil, tosses it under the seat, and starts acting as if the train car is his own personal gym.  He became the superhero Flash, well he tried.  He was using people as "prop players" by "breaking" them and pump-faking in their faces and he used the poles as training posts to maneuver around.  He got really close to me and I was hoping he'd just trip or topple over...but instead his basketball fell on one of my pink Polo sneakers.

Before recovering his ball, he looked me in the face and said "I'm so sorry."  This little boy looked like he was about to shit his shorts but that didn't stop me from hating him and glaring at him behind my Ray-Bans.  I wanted to say something, to speak for my fellow public transportation patrons.  But everything that came to mind would make me look like the new bad guy or it ended with me in jail.  So I didn't say anything and he took that as his cue to escape.  But for the rest of my train ride he made sure to stay away from my side of the car.

In other news, I still love my job and pretty much love it even more now.  I had the cutest couple come in and we spent close to four hours walking around and adding gifts to their registry.  They are so sweet and I wish them the best life together.  Their love is the love that inspires me to wait for the right one and to stop forcing people into someone I think might be right for me.  Love doesn't come prepackaged and handed to you.  Love is like making the perfect batch of brownies.  It doesn't come to you when you force it.  It comes when you pay attention to detail and accept the ingredients into your life.  After mixing them with knowledgeable experience, then you can put that bad boy in the oven and you'll know exactly when it's ready...or you can burn the house down too.

What the fuck am I blabbering about?  I'm tired LOL.  Let's get to this week's Word of the Week. 

Marriable (pronounced mae-ree-uh-bul): eligible to partake in matrimony; one who is a bachelor or bachelorette; a single person.

Ex: "Gabe, that girl over there is so hot.  You think I can get her number?"

"You can try but by the ring on her finger, it doesn't look like she's marriable."

Now it's time for some Words of Wisdom.

"Only the boring get bored.  But if you do become bored exit your comfort zone and try something new.  Make today more interesting than yesterday and make tomorrow a promise.  Live life like a flamboyant ninja."

I'm so excited for this week.  With my new check I'll be able to pay off my gym membership from last year and start a new one because ain't nobody got time for fat! (I stole that from my friend Tracie and Sweet Brown.)  And there's an event for school's alumni to come meet up and drink in the city...AND IT'S FOUR BLOCKS AWAY FROM MY JOB! MADNESS!

I think I've said enough for this week's post.

Have a fabulous week and keep it sassy.

I love you for reading!

-Gabriel Anderson

"Use 'Em & Lose 'Em"

Salutations my beautiful readers.  I hope you duckies are all doing well because life is just fantastic on this end.  Oh!  Happy Belated Easter/Zombie Jesus Day to you all!

(To all my devout followers who believe in Jesus, I am just joking.  I make jokes.  You'll get over it.)

Anyway, I've come to the conclusion that I'm attracted to men; however, I don't like them very much.  Yes, I've loved men in the past and have formed some intense and very delightful relationships with them.  But they have never been long-lasting or that entertaining.

I've really been thinking about this as of late and it's starting to make sense.  Maybe I'm just thinking too hard about the assholes that have betrayed me because I was watching "The Greatest Story Ever Told," yesterday.  (For those who aren't familiar with this particular film it's about Jesus and his life.  Very religious.)

In pretty much all of my relationships I have dated a "Judas," a betrayer.  Either they turned out to be emotionally or verbally abusive, bat-shit bonkers, or they decided that "messing around with guys" was just a phase.  Regardless of the reason I've always been left alone wondering what I did wrong in the relationship; but when I look at my relationships, I was always the good guy.

I would be the one compromising or the one forgiving them for calling me out of my name.  I think I'm just too nice and welcoming.  One of my faults is I tend to believe words rather than actions and I fall hard and fast.

I think the best thing for me is to get my life in order and not worry about love at the moment.  

Years ago, I heard someone say this in an interview and I was floored at why she would say such a thing.  Lady GaGa was being interviewed by Jay Leno--while I was in college--and he asked if she was dating or currently courting anyone.  Her answer was "I don't really worry about things like love anymore."  Hearing this then made me think she was some talented loon who must have been too busy to entertain the idea of a relationship.

Years later she came out with the song "Judas" and she got so much heat for it because it came off as blasphemous.  However, I love Lady GaGa so I'm biased when it comes to her; ergo, I loved the song LOL.  However, her explanation was quite riveting.  She elaborated that the biblical reference rang true to her own life because she had been a quite a few relationships with guys who were gentlemen at first but then betrayed her when she needed them the most.

So now I believe love isn't in the cards for me right now.  I won't object the idea of it, but looking for it is totally out of the question.

I just got inspired to give you a new Word of the Week.

Judasarian (pronounced joo-dis-sar-ee-an): betrayer; faulty person; one who leaves in the hour of need.

Example: "A friend who leaves you alone, in the middle of a fight because they're afraid, is a Judasarian."

Speaking of Judasarians, let me tell you about this guy I met about a week ago.  His name is ZaMorrie.  Yup, that's his real name.  I don't care if he reads this because what he did was incredibly treacherous.  

We were talking for a couple days and we planned on hooking up eventually.  Well this past Saturday night after I got home from work he texts me, drunk, and wanted me to come over to fuck him.  I, being the hornball I am, will hardly turn down any opportunity to have sex with attractive men (soon to be women...shhhh you didn't hear that) decided I would try my best to get over there.  Unfortunately for me, I only had one fare ($2.50) on my Metrocard.

I was in luck though because ZaMorrie told me that he would put me back on the train with no problem.  Duckies, I have never let my house without having a fare to get back home.  Anywho, I get to his place a little after 9 PM and we start watching a marathon of one of my favorite shows, "Guy Code," on MTV2.

Eventually we start making out and I loooooved making out with him because he smokes cigarettes.  I miss the taste of cigarettes on my tongue and having it back in my mouth on top of the pleasure from a kiss was like fireworks.

(Oh for those who don't know I stopped smoking cigarettes about 3 months ago!)

(As of April 1, 2013 at 6:25 PM this is my actual "quitting" progress.")

Moving along, we had sex like twice that night.  I practically fucked his brains out for hours, don't know how I did it, but I did LOL.  He tells me "Omg, that was amazing. Blah-blah-blah," which it was.  I enjoyed myself very much LOL. So we end up talking for a bit and go to bed around 4AM.  We wake up around 11AM entangled in each other's limbs, snuggling.

We get dressed and start heading toward the train station.  When we get past the front gate of his apartment building, he stops and says: "Shit, I forgot my wallet.  I can't help you out without that.  I'll be right back."

I'm like: "Cool.  I'll be down here waiting."

TEN MINUTES LATER...still no ZaMorrie.  Thinking he really can't find his wallet I shoot him a text, jokingly, saying: "Did you just ditch me? LOL."

An additional five minutes past and still no ZaMorrie.

Some dude in a suit comes out of the main door and let's me in because he obviously sees that I'm waiting for someone.  I go up the three flights to ZaMorrie's apartment and ring the doorbell.

I hear movement toward the door and then it stops.  He lives with his sister and I assume she was about to open the door because right before she could turn the handle he says:

"Don't open it!  That's him."

Then I heard the peephole open and close. Then I heard nothing else.

So basically ZaMorrie--I'll be nice enough not to share his last name--turned out to be a great big asshole in disguise.

Luckily for me I was only a good forty-five minutes WALK away from my house, so I made it home safely.  But what if I didn't know how to get home?  He would really use me and ditch me like that, after being such a "gentleman?"  Guys like ZaMorrie give men, gay and straight, a bad name.  Oh and if you're reading this, I don't feel bad now that your ex-husband cheated on you during your 10-year marriage by throwing sex parties with his friends.

Oh no, did I just tell the world that?  Oh well...

In other news, remember that cute dude I was talking to you about who is currently trying to end it with his boyfriend?  Well one of my predictions were right.  The day after I posted about him I had a conversation with him and he told me that after this relationship he's going to enjoy the single life for quite a bit.

Honestly, I don't blame him because being in a relationship is a full-time job.  And with the gay assholes running rampant in New York City (and Atlanta aka gay mecca) true love is a hard thing to come by.  But I'm going to keep on doing what I do best: being fabulous, sassy, and classy.

Speaking of classy, my friend Dave is one-sixth of this awesome band called "The Hunting Party," and they're having a concert this Friday, April 5th, 2013 at 8pm.  Click here to learn more about the band and hear their music and click here to learn more about the event.  

Unfortunately I won't be able to jam with them because my uncle's birthday is this Friday and he never celebrates it...but this year he wants to go to Johnny Utah's.  Plus I don't get off work on Friday until 8pm and I wouldn't wanna miss a minute of The Hunting Party's awesomeness.  Go and check them out this Friday.  You won't be disappointed!

I've spoken enough.  Let's get to some Words of Wisdom.

"Success isn't about where you are now, it's about what you're doing to get what you want later.  Success doesn't happen overnight but when it does it happens because you've paid your dues and you've fought for it.  Don't ever quit dreaming."

Okay my loves, tomorrow is my first official day as a Bridal Registry Consultant.  The last two weeks were just basic training.  Now I finally get to be in my pristine department.  Yay!

I love you for reading.  Have a fabulous week duckies!

-Gabriel Anderson

Going GaGa

'Ello duckies!  I hope all is well on your end because everything is fantastical on mine.

(I don't think you realize how hard it is to draw/write in pink paintbrush strokes, like that.  I'm even proud of myself.)

Duckies, I am so tired because I sat through my first day of Orientation at Bed Bath and Beyond.  I was there from 8:45AM until about 2AM, just listening to people speak for hours...but I know I'm going to love my job!

Not only does the job seem like so much fun and the people seem so nice...my new fellow co-workers are sooooo hot, especially this one dude.

God, I really hope he's not like younger than 21 because I do not plan on robbing the cradle: not my cup of tea, thank you very much.  

He's so gorgeous and we had to sit close to each other the whole day and I was literally in heaven because he has the most gorgeous smile and I can tell he's a cool guy.  Plus, he kept trying to talk to me during Orientation and kept laughing at things I laughed at too...okay maybe because actual funny things did happen during Orientation.

We had to watch this video about training (i.e. standing on ladders, how to properly lift boxes, open boxes, etc.) and you know how most training videos are so tongue-in-cheek corny and old.  Well he and I (and the other cool kids) were laughing pretty much the entire video.

The jokes weren't like "The Big Bang Theory" or "GIRLS" kind of funny, but the lack of comedy and overall trying to make a joke happen made the video funnier than its original purpose.  It was more like we were laughing at the video than with it.

Oh my jumping jack Jesus, did you guys see the season finale "GIRLS" last night?  I cried legit THREE times watching it. 

(If you don't want to read about any spoilers than you should skip all of the red colored text.)

I cried when Ray and Shoshana finally called it quits because Shosh couldn't put up with Ray's lack of "ambition."  I kind of agree with Shoshana's "plight" though.  I feel as though Ray didn't really like anything but her, as she stated, and had no interest in bettering his life.  Granted, I'm 24 going on 25 in August but I'm trying to make shit happen with my life.  Ray is in his early thirties and still hasn't gotten his shit together or even had an inkling to what his shit should even look like.

Another part where I cried was when Marnie stopped dicking around and admitted to Charlie how she really felt about him and he said, "That's all I ever wanted to hear."  Like seriously?!  Marnie and Charlie are the cutest couple because Charlie is so handsome and endearing, whereas Marnie is so beautiful and timidly blunt (if there's even such a thing).  Sorry to jump to last week's episode but Marnie's version of Kanye West's "Stronger" was fucking hilarious.  Click here to watch it! LOL

(Did anyone notice Shoshana in the background, while Marnie was singing? She's in this picture if you look closely.)

And the last part that made me cry was when Adam ran (and took a train) to Hannah's house because he knew she wasn't in her right state of mind.  Mind you he did this shirtless and he practically "FaceTimed" with her until he had to kick down her front door and pick her up in his big, strong arms...to passionately kiss her.

I was so moved by last night's episode of "GIRLS" that right after watching it, I ran into my younger sister's room and said, "That was so beautiful."  But while saying it I couldn't hold back my tears and I started crying and she was like "Awww, you're really crying right now?!" I laid my head in her lap for like twenty-seconds and let out my silent tears and tiny bursts of laughter...but between those tears I felt a wash of loneliness.  

Although "GIRLS" is fictitious and well-written, I wish my life were more like it.  I can relate to pretty much every character on the show.  I can say that I have a mental disorder that effects my daily life.  I can say that I have a father that didn't pay much attention to me when I was younger.  I can say that I used to push people that truly loved me away sometime ago.  But now I can say that I want that real love: the love that hurts and makes you do nice things for them, even though they called you a name ten minutes ago.  I was so moved by that episode of "GIRLS" that I wrote a poem; more like spewed my raw emotions onto my iPhone.  I entitled it "Together," like the title of the season finale of "GIRLS."

Speeding toward the light and promise of you,

I can only feel my wings taking turns lifting my heart.

You are the answer.

I am the world.

Love for us isn't forever.  Love for us is now and tomorrow. 

My love burns for you and you cool me down with the simplest of touches.

I need to roll in your desire and wrap myself in your need.

This is forever us.

Together, we are.

So yeah, I was definitely feeling the love bug last night.  I've been single for quite awhile now and I'm just tired of playing the single, slutty game where I just find temporary romance, only after fucking someone's brains out.

Meaningless sex has become such a common thing in my life that sometimes I have sex just because I don't feel like masturbating.  But you know what?  I need to stop that!  If I want to find love I need to shut off my hormones and start thinking with my heart and not my...

Oh!  I saw this word the other day and I thought I'd share it with you as a "WORD OF THE WEEK."  (Yeah, that was random...but you should know me by now.)

This WORD OF THE WEEK is...

Askhole (pronounced "ehsk-ho-la") - One who asks for advice when in dilemmas, only to go against it; one who does the opposite of what is advised.

Ex: Person 1 - "Henry always does the same thing.  If you tell him to stay home, he'll want to hang out.  If you tell him to hang out, he'll want to stay home."

Person 2 - "Oh child, don't you know Henry's a big ol' askhole?"

I guess I should get to some Words of Wisdom while I'm at it.

"In order to achieve happiness, you must create it.  If you focus on not having it, you will only attract the opposite of happiness.  Think happy thoughts.  Laugh until you're lightheaded and crying.  Life is yours to take, one smile at a time."

BREAKING NEWS!

My best friend Elle Fox just called and informed me she just got an apartment!  This is her first apartment as an adult!!!

I'm so proud of her and this new step in her beautiful journey she calls life.  GO ELLE!!!

In more news, in regards to me moving out I'm giving myself an extension, only until January 2014.  I figured that my birthday was too close for what I'm asking.  I don't want a roommate...

(so I can do everything naked)

 and I want exquisite furniture.  Plus, I want to renew my membership at Planet Fitness...

and I would like to activate my iPhone 4 or upgrade to a better version.

In addition, student loans are so far up my ass that I can taste the bill collector's breath when they call my house.

Anywho loves, I'm going to get my things ready for day two of Orientation tomorrow and then head over to celebrate with Elle.

I love you for reading.

-Gabriel Anderson