Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Time to get Dirty

(THIS POST IS MORE GRAPHIC THAN USUAL...TASTEFUL, BUT GRAPHIC NONETHELESS. I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE.)

Duckies...OMG! I have some bad news. I didn't blog last night because I got a tearful call from Mommy. Gabriella's class raised a lot of money for this charity and were rewarded with a trip to Brazil. We were proud of her so we let her go, since she can BBM us and stuff.
Anywho, Mommy called me--crying--telling me Gabriella was attacked by a tiger!



Gabriella survived though; she was airlifted to a nearby hospital. Her vitals are stabilized and she's in intensive care. But I can't stop tearing up...because I am sooooooo kidding.


HAPPY APRIL FOOLS!
(That was good right?)

Anywho, I want to get dirty in this post. I've been getting some sass updates from some duckies and they want me to share it with you today.

Yesterday a duckie told me that he is tired of mens' restrooms. I asked him why and he told me that every bathroom he's used on campus has boogers above the urinals!



Duckies, come on?! Why can't you blow your noses like everyone else? It really isn't that hard. What you do is get a tissue and blow your green cousins onto it and Baklahdah! Simple, easy, done!

In other news I've noticed that a lot of people have cold sores on campus.

I've never had a cold sore and I won't because I take certain precautions. They go as follows:

1) Never share drinks with ANYONE! (If you do find their lip print on the glass and drink on the exact opposite of the mark. Or if its a small lip--like a Snapple or Sprite bottle-- don't put your lips on the bottle; elevate the bottle and pour. This doesn't work for cans.)
2) Don't kiss anyone with a cold sore. (Duh!)
3) When you wash your face, scrub your lips too. (Lips are extensions of your mouth. The mouth is the 2nd dirtiest thing humans have.)
4) Use medicated lip balm/chapstick/ointment.

Woooohuh! Sorry duckies, I've been witnessing these things and it's time to clean house!

Yaaay!

Speaking of happiness, let's get to some "Words of Wisdom."

"The immediate events that happen in our lives are heavily influenced by the thoughts we focus on. If you think of unfortunate events, negative things will corner you. If you think positive thoughts everything will be sunshine and rainbows, even when there's a thunderstorm. Suffocate yourself with positive thoughts and you'll breathe positivity."

Duckies, I am obsessed with "Disco Heaven" by Lady Gaga!
Click here to listen to it!

Okay, I have to go about my A-List day. See you duckies later.
I wish you the best of happiness. Stay true.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson

3 comments:

Alex Byer said...

I can't even verbalize how much I love you.

Matt Reddick said...

... what is the 1st dirtiest place on a human...?

Denise said...

I love the words of wisdom; "suffocate yourself with positive thoughts and you'll breath positivity." That's so poetic. I love it.