Thursday, June 25, 2009

I Like It Rough

Good morning duckies!
I hope all is well because that's how everyday should be. I just got to work not too long ago and I feel amazing. I slept for more than 7 hours last night!

Yay, go me!
Anywho, while I was on the train I saw two of the most random things: a guy with a incredibly pronounced moose knuckle and a penny-pinching lady!
I saw Ms. Penny first.

I was sitting on the train reading Toni Morrison's "The Bluest Eye," behind my GaGa-inspired shades: they hinder the paparazzi from poisoning my eyes with blinding lights and glares.

Ms. Penny, who was sitting directly across from me on the 6 train, was hardcore jamming to whatever tunes she had on her iPod. Her convulsive movements kept luring my eyes from my book so I decided to give her my undivided attention, while hiding behind my sunglasses.
As the train door opens someone ran out of the train doors (it's New York, it's expected) and dropped a penny in their rush.
Ms. Penny stopped her sporadic dancing and lightning-grabbed the penny. (I swear she caught it before it fell to the ground.)
At first I found it comical that she reacted so viciously quick to something as minute as a penny. But then I realized she made a bold move.

Nowadays, pennies aren't appreciated as much as they used to be, because they can hardly get you anything. They're only good for that irksome thing we call "taxes." With our economy in its current state Ms. Penny was only showing her gratitude for pennies. Pennies, believe it or not, are still accepted by merchants. I don't pick up pennies--unless they're really shiny and are heads-up--but Ms. Penny's actions showed me that small treasures and opportunities are everywhere: we just need to know where to look.

Shortly after Ms. Penny's lightning-grab, a guy wearing a "Print Industries" button-up work shirt walks into the train car and sat right next to Ms. Penny. His hair was braided haphazardly and he--like Ms. Penny--decided the train wasn't only a mode of transportation but also a dance rehearsal venue. He was jamming pretty rough, while reading the New York Times. He was jamming so rough that I had to pause from reading on several occasions to stare at him lol. It was very entertaining...but what I saw next scared me.
When he raised his New York Times I saw his well-pronounced moose knuckle. (For you duckies unaware of what a moose knuckle is, a moose knuckle is a frontal wedgie--predominately produced by men--that occurs when your pants hug your genitals a little too much. It resembles a moose's knuckle.)

Anywho, I often find myself staring at crotch's of men and women but moose knuckles are peculiar cases. It's like watching child birth: nauseating, intriguing, stomach-wrenching, enticing, and just plain wrong.
It wasn't the fact that he was well-endowed that kept me astonished and gazing. It was the fact that it looked painful and he must have known his genitals were being hugged more than a Care Bear hugging a rainbow. If he didn't know, I'll keep him in my thoughts. Mr. Moose Knuckle, I wish you the best with shopping for snugger underwear and bigger pants.

In other news, I feel like I need to start working out again.

The last time I remember working out at the gym was's almost July. Wow, I just realized I've been a lazy-ass for seven months...but a productive lazy-ass nonetheless lol. I mean I did choreograph a dance and have been dancing all summer but that's not the same. I want to increase my endurance, stamina and my inner-core strength before the summer is over. Not to mention, my birthday is coming up: August 19th. (I will be expecting gifts duckies lol).

Speaking of summer, I have another SummerBoy update!

As of yesterday, I'm reviewing a SummerBoy application of this hot dude that lives on the same street as me (he lives no more than thirty feet away from my house). He's funny and rough. By rough, I mean this dude is a dude: straight-up hardcore, masculine, "you-would-never-think-I'm-gay-until-you-catch-me-messing-around-with-your-gay-best-friend" kind of dude. His name is Nigel.
The only bad thing about him is he lives so close to me. He texted me this morning, calling me Mr. Purple Shirt.
Duckies, I'm wearing a purple shirt today!!! That's a little creepy...and hot.
He's only going to be in New York for a couple of months. Nigel is from Florida and he recently inured himself at work, hence him moving out to New York to recover and relax. He says he's fine though. And I don't mind having a sexy neighbor around for the summer. I'm good at helping hotties recover. lol (That was dirty!)

Enough of that! Let's get to some "Words of Wisdom."

"In order to truly appreciate something, you have to understand the circumstances of your life in its absence. Without experiencing the loss of something, you will never really know how credible and invaluable things are to you. Hold onto to your darlings, your "everythings"--even the little things--and show them your relentless gratitude."

Okay duckies, it's time for me to get some work done. I'm going to try to finish four lengthy submissions today. Wish me luck.

I wish you the best of happiness. I love you. Stay true and tuned.

Live, love & Lady Gaga
Gabriel Anderson