Friday, June 8, 2012

The Summer of Sexy

Evening duckies.  I hope all is well on your end because I have just been feeling so fabulous recently.  This Vision Board is really doing some great things to my overall energy.  It hangs right above my guest chair in my room and every time I look at it, it makes me smile.  My Vision Board was such a success that my little sister declared her jealousy and went out and bought some poster board to create her own.
I did it first LOL...but I'm glad my goals and arts and crafts inspired her to map out her future as well.  Have I told you guys how much I love her?  She is so divine.  She's only 17 and she's going to be a Sophomore at University of New Haven this September.  (Well she'll be 18 by then, but you get my point.)  Love you Gabriella!

Anywho, last night my friend Mallory and I were talking about something that really hit home for me.  It's being the third wheel.  Before you even say anything I want you to know that I am all for finding love--I mean have you not read my blog?--or intense lust...but don't make it awkward for your friends.
Recently one of my great friends has been so smitten with her boyfriend that I feel like the ultimate third wheel.  It's one thing to have your boyfriend around but to just be all over him when I'm's kind of gross.  It hurts me to say this but I feel like I've become the other man in her life.  Don't get me wrong they are an amazing couple but when you're the only person in the audience it gets mucho awkward.  Love you girl, but let's turn the PDA down from a 35 to a 7.  Thank you.  (I think we'll hang out more when this agonizing honeymoon stage is over.)
The thing is when I have a boyfriend (or person of interest), yes I'm like obsessed with him, but I make sure that he's more like a prized accessory than life support when we're around my friends.  I make an effort not to smother it everyone's faces with a "Hey, look at us. We like the tastes of each other's saliva and we don't care what you think or say about it," kind of attitude.

Aside from that life has been pretty dandy.  Today I woke up around 2pm...yes, I said 2pm (being unemployed has its perks too).  You know what they say, the early bird gets the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Anywho, after waking up in the afternoon my uncle calls me (he lives downstairs in our tricked-out basement) and asks me if I wanted to go to gym and pay off my membership.  Duckies, I don't think you know how much that means to me.  My gym membership had an outstanding balance of $179.93!  Mind you I only have to pay $20 a month for my membership so you can imagine how many payments I missed; eight monthly payments to be exact.  But technically it wasn't my fault.  During my most recent bipolar episode, back August 2011, I took out too much money from the bank and they froze my account.  I don't even think I have an account anymore with Bank of America.  Those dicks...
So we paid my balance and I began to work out like I thought I could last year.
Oh my loving Gaga and extra sharp cheddar cheese!!! 
I used to be a beast in the gym.  My warm-up would be the thirty minute walk to the gym from my house, followed by an hour on the elliptical (with an average speed of 9.0).  After that I would scan the gym for available machines, usually the leg press or butterfly curl.  And then I would go on the cycling/spin machine, with a resistance of 20 for about thirty minutes. After that I would probably call it a day, with so much energy and a heavy surge of endorphins.  
Well today nearly none of that happened.  I mounted the elliptical all cool and sassy.  I found my newly crafted "Slimmin' It" playlist on my iPod and began to workout.  After about 15 minutes on the elliptical I had a stomach cramp, my heart felt like it was about to explode, and I sweating like a house on the night of a tornado.
But I'm a I decided to do extra twenty minutes on the elliptical before calling it quits.  Upon leaving the gym I felt so weak and everything was in slow-motion.  I was pretty sure I was about to pass out.  (Did I mention that I forgot to eat before I went to work out?)  To save myself from a heat stroke and face planting in the streets I bought myself an icee from one of those Hispanic vendors that always have like Rainbow, Coco (Coconut), Mango, and other flavors on the cart.  
They usually have only four flavors.  But sometimes they try to get fancy and put two separate flavors in one cooling compartment of their cart, giving them more variety over the rest.  Luckily the sugar gave me enough energy to drag my ass home, right into my bed.
When I got home I felt like I was dreaming, that's how weak I was.  I only did a thirty-five minute work out and an hour walk (if you count going to and leaving from the gym) and I felt like a living zombie. Oh no, I wasn't smoking bath salts. I won't be a part of that statistic.
After I regained my energy via shrimp and chicken dumplings, after a nap, I had to get on my hands and knees and scrub like Annie and Cinderella.
Tomorrow my family and I are having our first hookah night in the house.  And since we're having company over I had to slave away in the kitchen for hours: scrubbing floors, washing garbage cans and polishing them, cleaning out the microwave, scrubbing the refrigerator doors, cleaning the stove, scrubbing the counter tops, sweeping, moving furniture to get all the places my mother's hawk eyes will scout and eventually lead her to bark about, and tons of other things.  Gabriella cleaned the bathroom and the living room...she even shampooed the carpet in there.  Talk about dedication to chores.  But I don't blame her and myself for being so diligent in our cleaning because if we didn't do it our sweet mother would have transformed into this...
So as you see, we did the right thing.  Besides that my day was pretty chill.
Oh! Antonio called me out of the blue today.
I didn't think I'd hear from him so soon.  I saw him this Wednesday.  Unfortunately the call wasn't anything longer than thirty seconds because he had to do something.  He said he'd call me sometime later in the night when he could give me his full attention.  If he does, wonderful.  If he doesn't, there's always other days.  
Is he gonna stay around?  I hope so!  LOL, oh!  Did I tell you he's housesitting for his friend next week and he invited to stay over if I wanted.  I think I left quite an impression.  Or maybe I'm just that good in bed.  Regardless of his motives I'm definitely gonna try and make him my SummerBoy.

Enough with the frivolity.  It's time to get down to some "Words of Wisdom."

"Remember to smile because joy is contagious.  Make strangers into friends and think of a world where fear is obsolete.  Create a life of courtesy, serenity, and happiness for yourself.  Be kind to others and the world will smile back."

I created a similar version of today's "Words of Wisdom" for my Little Little (my protege's protege) in Red Caps (University of Hartford's spectacular Summer Orientation program) to share with as many Red Caps as he could so they would have something inspirational to pep them into the third session of Orientation. (LOOOOOOVE YOU LITTLE LITTLE! I hope you delivered the message.  If not, it doesn't matter.  You got to see it and I still love you.)

Well duckies, this post is coming to an end.  But I have good news.  I've decided that since I have such free time on my hands that I should make my blog daily again, blogging Monday-Friday starting June 11, 2012!
Tell your friends! Follow my blog. (Look at the sidebar it shows you how to become an official follower. It's so easy.) You know you want to. Spread the gospel of Gabriel Anderson's sassy and inspirational adventures.

With that being said, I'll see you guys on Monday with some new sassy stories and tons of love.  
I love you for reading.

Stay Sassy.
-Gabriel Anderson