Saturday, February 28, 2009

Live it, Love it, Sass it, Fcuk It

Hello duckies! I have such juicy sassip (sassy-gossip) to share with you. Last night was "Up Til Dawn" and it was fabulous. It was basically the follow-up banquet/party for our letter-sending fundraiser (which was headed by--no other than--my jetsetter people-friend Alyssa) for St. Jude's Children's' Hospital for Cancer Research.

There was indoor ice skating, caricature painting, a Chinese letter artist, t-shirt creations, tons of sustenance, live music (by L'Shir and Hawkapella), game shows, giveaways, raffles, contests, board games, card games, coloring books and Build-A-Bear. And guess what duckies? I made a duck!!! His name is Duckie Anderson. He's so adorable; I have to take a picture with him to show you his gorgeousness.

OH! In addition to all of the mentioned festivities WSAM (the school's radio station) was there to play music. Rockstar and I were the first DJ's to go on and we had some hot jams. But when you have something great, people will hate. Duckies, they cut our show, unexpectedly, halfway through! Not the Up Til Dawn staff but Andy (the) Dick. Andy decided to prohibit anyone on stage so the divine A'Capella groups had to take our venue, halfway through our ridiculously phenomenal playlist.

Andy, I understand you hate your life and those who love their lives but cut the $hit. You're attitude toward everyone at "Up Til Dawn" was unprofessional and inexcusable. I hope your future career doesn't involve human relations because you're not going to get a job. And if you do you'll end up hating yourself even more (if that's even possible). For the sake of everyone, do something productive and positive duckie; don't be jealous of our lives.


Speaking of beautiful, Christina, Graham & I danced to "Single Ladies" in front of practically everyone last night.

I think I did exceptionally well since I haven't danced in so long. I just let Leroy (the hardcore performer inside) take over. (I've been told videos will be on Facebook shortly...oh goodie! lol)

Speaking of later, tonight is BSU's annual Fashion Show. This year it's called "Chronicles of Couture" and I believe it's going to be quite fabulous.

Monica is one of the jetsetting directors of the show and I can't wait to see it. Graham and I are getting front row seats...positive thinking! OMG, I have to get dressed.

Let's get to some "Words of Wisdom."

"Starting over is the biggest step one can take to benefit one's life. Experience is everything. Regardless of what happened in the past today is a new day to be fabulous. Believe in yourself and everything will be stupendous."

Okay duckies, I really have to jet to my room to get dolled up for the show. I wish you the best of happiness. Stay true.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson

Friday, February 27, 2009

Another One Bites the Sass

Hello duckies. I am in a whirlwind right now. So much is happening and has happened within the past couple hours. Anywho, let's just dive right in.

Yesterday I found out that one of my professors has the same coat as I do.

I was sitting next to him in class and I saw his coat on the table behind us...and it was the exact same coat I was wearing! It was a tad bit smaller to accentuate his petite frame but it looked more chic in a smaller size. My personality drowns my coat, making it divine. (Woooohuh, I love my coat!)

In regards to yesterday there was a Men's Basketball game and they lost. I just don't get it. We have a strong team, everyone fulfills their place in the team's puzzle. Just because a couple players are not able to participate does not mean the puzzle should be disconnected. They need to believe in themselves.

More importantly, fans need to believe in them too. Students and ticket-holders leave right in the middle of second half and it does nothing for the team. In order for something to follow through you must be able to envelope it with confidence, pride, diligence and belief; mainly belief.
We can do this Hartford!

Anyway, before I found out my professor and I had the same coat I ran into this girl on campus. It was pretty random: I didn't know her name and she didn't know mine either. But out of this "blind conversation" she told me she abhors her Elementary Education studies she's been conducting. She's a senior now, mind you. I told her she should make a drastic change in her career path and she told me she wants to pursue Occupational Therapy (a.k.a. OT). She seemed so jaded and detached from her future, already, and I just wanted to hug her sasspression out of her.

But that would have been awkward because we didn't even know each others' names. But I do wish her the best. Follow your heart duckie.

In other news, on my way back from classes (last night) I passed this lady standing in front of a vending machine screaming "No! My M+M's are stuck!"
I looked through the vending machine glass and the M+M's were indeed stuck, one corner still latched onto the machine's distributing coil. She turns to me.

Lady: (in a demanding tone) "Help me."
Me: (puzzled) "Umm, this machine is heavy."
Lady: (unnerved) "So, help me. Shake it. My M+M's are stuck."
Me: (with hesitation) "Okay. I'll shake it I guess."

The machine was lighter than I though it to be. I was shaking it, violent. The other assorted candies danced in place while the M+M's teased us, never falling. Minutes pass and I decide to stop believing in this rude woman's plea. Miraculously, another male comes and offers her money.
Kid: "You want a dollar, ma'am? You're not gonna get your money back."

I walk away from them both. She was too sassy for me to assist her any longer.

Anywho, it's definitely time for some "Words of Wisdom."

"It's better to be late than left behind. Coming into something later than others throws you into a situation parallel to the initially planned schedule; simultaneously hindering immediate comprehension and (yet) enabling you to develop a fresh take. Don't make tardiness a habit though duckies. Just know that it's never too late to learn."

OH! In between blogging (this post) I had to release some earthiness, as we all do on a daily basis. After releasing, I discovered there wasn't any soap in the bathroom. (To think of it, there hasn't been soap in the basement bathroom this entire week!)

It's so gross, thinking about how many male duckies used the basement bathroom without washing their hands with soap. To ensure I wasn't fulfilling the stereotype I made my way to the second floor bathroom to utilize the soap there. I'm a clean duckie!

I just had a double espresso and I have to change the world today...well that's what the espresso is telling me.

Pete: You're aren't just important to me because of our common ground with putrid tendencies. You are adorable. You make me laugh when I'm stressed out and you have the tendency to keep me sane. Total bromance. Don't ever change. You're magnificent the way you are.

Okay duckies, I gotta run. I wish you the best of happiness. Stay true.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Ode to Nick

Hey duckies. Recently my double-ex (my boyfriend before last) has been talking to me. Yes, I've been talking back and sometimes I initiate the conversation. But it just makes things all the more difficult. I still have feelings for him (they've depleted on) but I know better because those feelings will only lead to...breaking-up again. I must admit I am a difficult person to court. One day I could be the nicest person in the world and the next day I could be the most stressed-out biotch! But what disturbed me about our relationship was Nick's need for...affection. Our relationship was based on it. Plus, I'm physically bigger than Nick...he's so short

and that bothers me so much. I want to look up to my soul mate, not tower over them. (Maybe that symbolizes what I want in a relationship, someone to look up to, not someone I supersede.)

Well anywho, Nick is going to be up here (Connecticut) for his graduate school audition at Yale.

I haven't mentioned this but Nick is a big deal. He's a double major in piano and organ. I only date A-list men and Nick is pretty up there. He currently has a job playing for churches around the country and he basically has a job waiting for him after college...a phenomenal job. Nick was a good catch.

Anyway, Feb. 24th was his 21st birthday and he called me around 2am, drunk off his a$$, saying:

"Oh baby I love you. I wanna be with you. I'm gonna be in New Haven on Thursday. Come see me. Take a bus to New Haven and I'll pick you up. I wanna hold you all night...blah-blah-blah."

After close examination (well, until I heard he wasn't going to drive me back to campus...just to the bus station...not okay) I declined his invitation.
Dude went psycho.

"You're bipolar Gabriel. You need professional help. One minute you can be so nice, the next minute you're a bitch! Look for professional help and I'll pay for it. You need it."

(You duckies know how I feel about hiring people for's so A-list. I almost took up his offer for professional help just because it would be free.)
But it dawned on me that Nick was displacing his anger for not being able to persuade me to come over to his hotel to "show him affection." I told him he just made forgetting about him so much easier. I wish you the best duckie.

Wooohuh, enough about Nick!

There's an issue that's been bothering me for the longest. The University of Hartford doesn't take VISA any longer!

And guess what kind of cards are issued by Bank of America (which happens to be the only bank on campus)? VISA!

WTF?! Doesn't anyone else see anything wrong with this picture? In addition to this financial-sass if you do not have Bank of America, the ATMs on campus charge you an extra $2...on top of your withdrawal and what your home bank will charge you. Sometimes I only have $2 in my account so I'm glad I have Bank of America (lol sorry I like to shop). I'll get over it eventually.

In other news, yesterday was Ash Wednesday and I totally forgot until I stared at this girl's forehead, walking toward me, thinking she fell forehead first into dirt. My people-friend Alyssa calls it Catholic Hobo Chic. I call it...

Anywho, it's time for some "Words of Wisdom."

"Never chase after someone that runs away without hesitation. If something gives you blatant signs of not wanting to be with you, let them run off and miss your splendid offerings. It's hard to let go of what you know. But duckie, you're worth more than you think."

Penny: Thank you for becoming a follower of my blog and for being beautiful.
This day is yours! It's always a pleasure to be in the library when you're working. It makes me so happy that someone funny and efficient is on the staff.
Pete: Thanks for not letting me be the only gross one on campus.
Alyssa: A-list ('nuff said.)
Noelle: Happy 22nd duckie! You're so beautiful and I know amazing things are in your future. All I have to say is "Move that bus!" lol
Rockstar: We had a beautiful radio show today. I wish we had recorded it. (There's always next time.)
J Boys: Thanks for being your spectacular selves and thank you for stopping by the studio today.
It's been a long day and tomorrow is going to be just as magnificent. I wish you the best of happiness. Stay true duckies.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

A Sassy Purpose

Hey duckies. Yesterday was a pleasantly enlightening day. During my African-American Rhetoric class, my professor asked if anyone had a blog; springing to action I shot my hand upward. She then inquired about the purpose and focal point of my blog. I responded, superficially, saying it was mainly focused on my life and what happens in a typical day. Immediately after saying this I was overwhelmed with shallowness. Was I really an arrogant narcissist begging for fifteen minutes of fame?
To clarify the purpose of my blog I wrote an email to my professor, after class:

"Hey Professor. I feel like I didn't give you an adequate description of my blog. My blog, The Sass Corner, is an appropriate portrayal of my life and my daily interaction with the world. It's focused on my life and my reflective insight on my day. At the end of my post I create inspirational quotes to enable readers to think positive, regardless of the circumstance."

Duckies, I blog because I love writing and helping people. Life is jazz; life is a jumbled compilation of beauty; life is tough and only the positive survive. Sometimes everyone needs a little reminder that we're beautiful.

As you may have noticed I do not have a hit counter on my page. At first the hit counter wasn't there because I didn't know how to install one on my blog lol. But then I realized that if I did put one here I would base my blogging off of my hits. I blog to share life lessons with the world so more people can love and appreciate this stupendous catastrophe we call life. I blog to inspire.

I blog for you duckie!
I'm glad my professor put me "on the spot" because if she hadn't I think I wouldn't have really known the true purpose of my blog. (Thank you Professor B!)

In regards to positive thinking, I recently lost the left glove of my favorite pair. (Rockstar was with me when this happened.) Upon realizing I lost a glove I said "Forget it. I'm not going to worry about it. It'll come back to me...or this is just a perfect excuse to go shopping(lol)."
So yesterday I was walking out of Auerbach Hall and I look down and there was my glove!

This glove wasn't in its cleanest state, it was lost for a week. But luckily I was on my way to my room to start my laundry.

(My glove is clean and ready to take on the world.)

Do you see what happened duckies? I thought positively about the situation instead of running around in a state of panic. When in doubt think happy thoughts.

Anywho, I think its time for some "Words of Wisdom."

"Hating something is taking the easy way out; loving something is the hard part. When you hate something you dismiss its value for insignificant whereas love takes patience, compromise and fidelity. 'Hate' is a strong word but 'love' demands characters."

OMG, I haven't given you the word of the week.

"The Word of the Week" is:
Sudge- To cast judgement onto another; to sass harshly; being a d$%k or a bi%^h.
Ex: "So what if I like getting Starbucks everyday; don't sudge me! Let me live my life."

Okay duckies, I have to start some homework that's due in less than four hours. (As said before, its not procrastination if you plan to do it later.)

I wish you the best of happiness. Stay true.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Reading does the body good

Well hello beautiful. Today has been such a phenomenal day. Nothing really eventful happened but if felt good to be back on campus, seeing all my pretty duckies. People have been complaining about the upcoming week already but I think saying how horrible it is aloud is another way of forcefully believing a horrific outcome. So to all those sad duckies worrying about the "impending doom" of this week...

put on a happy face because life is beautiful.

Anywho, today I had a meeting with Professor Voldemort and to my surprise he was such a doll.

We planned out the rest of my college career, seeing if I had enough credits to fulfill my double-major (in Rhetoric & Professional Writing) or let it rest as a minor. I need to take four more classes (2 during each upcoming semesters) if I wanted to fulfill the RPW major. Mind you, I still need to fulfill my other major (English, Creative Writing emphasis). (Take the survey above to help me out duckies!)

In other news, I've realized that I love my life even more when I read books (for leisure) and I recently picked up the habit again. I'm currently reading...

and it's so good. The first two sentences reeled me in and I'm eating it up. It's about this English columnist's retelling his sexual experiences...but get this. His job as a columnist is for a sex site and he is always assigned a multitude of bizarre sex adventures. It's so good. Go and buy a copy now!

Speaking of adventure, one of my people-friends Alyssa just landed a consultant job in Texas!

She'll get to travel the U.S., all jetsetter like, and her job entails (basically) being fabulous, creative and efficient. She'll have no problem at all. I love you Alyssa. I'm so excited for you!

On the topic of being excited, I was relaxing in the main student lounge on campus and a friend approached me. Midway through of conversation he (his name is Aiden) pulls out his phone, but not just any phone. He pulls out his new BlackBerry Storm!

And OMG, he even has the same chromed out case as me! I asked if he had BBM (BlackBerry Messenger) and he said yes. I'm glad he did because having a BlackBerry without BBM is like having a car without tires.

Okay duckies, it's time for some "Words of Wisdom."

"Sometimes life is too busy is keep track of all the goals we want to achieve. As a solution, make a master list of goals you'd like to achieve and place the list where you will see it everyday. Have a mission statement at the top of when you'd like to achieve these goals. Envision yourself with the goals you've proposed and before you know it...your goals will become a reality. Believe in yourself duckies!"
(Here's a pic of my "Life Contract" for 2009.)

Eddie: I saw you today at the Nest and after I was coming back from the library. I want you to know that I appreciate you and I thank you for taking time to read my blog. I thoroughly enjoyed our outrageous conversation in the foyer of Eagle Hall. I love you fam!

Limp Biscuit: You know who you are. I am sooooooo glad that you are well. I was shocked to hear about your ski accident and I'm glad you're still divine. I can't express how much I loved our conversation on the phone last night. Thank you for being you.

Duckies, it's been a long day and tomorrow is going to be even more attractive. I wish you the best of happiness. Stay true.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson

Monday, February 23, 2009

Elle's $30 BlackBerry

Well hello beautiful. This past weekend was amazing. I didn't do much but I loved it. Sometimes the best opinion comes from alien eyes. (That was a random quote lol).

Speaking of alien it's been awhile since I've gotten a haircut and I like the way it looks. I look fresh. Anywho, I decided to go back to the barbershop on Saturday. (Remember I left the barbershop because Gabriella and Mommy were leaving too, on Friday? Back to the barbershop!)

I had to wait two hours to get my haircut because my barber was so slow and he had the nerve to be on the phone for most of the time.

Plus, someone farted in the shop and didn't confess. (I swear it wasn't me duckies. I have pride in my gas.)

Later that evening, all fresh and clean, Elle and I decided to hit up this chic lounge for a couple hours.

We spoke about our glamorous futures, had a few adult beverages, had a heart-to-heart and roamed the city...while dancing our way to the Starbucks at Union Square.

When we got there, two baristas (one who obviously needed to stop lying to himself about this sexuality) were arguing over a male barista's (the "gay" one) choice to end a relationship. The "gay" one said he ended it because the girl was checking his phone, MySpace, Facebook and pockets (on a daily basis), to see if he was cheating on her. Gay or not, that would drive any person away.

Elle and I were laughing at their frivolous arguments...until she checked her purse and realized she lost her BlackBerry!

(Que the dramatic music!)

We immediately backtracked our steps, Starbucks in hand, but Elle's BlackBerry was nowhere to be found. I kept telling Elle to believe that it would come back to her because negative thinking would only worsen the situation. She tried believing in it until we both got tired of searching for it. We parted ways, going home soon thereafter, but I didn't give up. During the car ride back to Hartford I texted Elle's BlackBerry saying:

"Hi, if you have my friend's phone her name is Elle and her house number is (can't post it here duckies). Please be the beautiful person that you are and call to return her phone."

A couple hours after I got back on campus Elle texts me saying a lady found her phone and (with my help) was able to call her house to return it. Elle's parents drove her downtown to get her BlackBerry. (Only the true A-list are driven around.)

All Elle had in her wallet was $30 so she gave it to the kind woman.

The woman wasn't expecting a reward, she was just happy to see a BlackBerry back with it's owner. Yay happy endings!

In regards to happy endings, Aaron (my ex-people-friend) called me today. I didn't pick up because I'm so over that unproductive duckie. He left a message saying:

so I can know to stop calling you."

WTF? Honestly? If your so-called best friend hasn't been returning your calls since 2008 then you should take the hint. Aaron, I'm sorry but you just added stress to my life. I wish you the best with everything.

Okay duckies, I've held it off long enough. Here are some "Words of Wisdom."

"Biases are just familiar perceptions; you really can't blame people for hiding behind known territories. But when people try to force or envelope their biases upon you...then it becomes a problem."

By the way, I am in love with "The House Bunny."

(It's playing in the background right now.)
It's one of those movies that you can watch over and over again without wanting to OD on Pepto bismol.

Duckies, it's time to cuddle with my pillow. I wish you the best. Stay true.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Sass Sweet Sass

Hello duckies. I'm blogging from my precious home in NYC (thank God my parents didn't redecorate my room). So far I've been relaxing in my neighborhood; I tried getting my haircut but then Gabriella was there, because she had an appointment with her stylist. Then before I could get a haircut our mother came in to pay Gabriella's stylist and so I was like "fu%k this, I'm leaving with my family." I'll just get a haircut later on today. I love them so much and its...

But getting here wasn't easy. Thanks to Graham cancelling on giving me a ride, the day before I was scheduled to leave (thanks buddy) I had to catch a ride from my friend Diamond. Mind you, Diamond has a sinus infection (get well sweetie) and I felt bad that I woke her from her well-deserved slumber. Diamond, thank you so much for being the considerate doll I know you to be. You drove me to the bus stop even though you told me you felt like crap and you waited until I got on the bus. Diamond,

Anywho, I bought my first bus ticket (thanks to Graham again, for baiting me with their low prices) from Megabus.

I paid $15.50 for bus travel, from Hartford, CT to New York City. However, the bus stop was changed from being in front of the Convention Center to some weird cross street. Plus the bus didn't arrive until 12:20pm (five minutes are it's scheduled time for departure) and Hartford was (apparently) the last pick-up stop before heading to New York; the bus was full! No one was willing to let me sit next to them. Luckily, a very nice lady, with a BlackBerry, let me sit next to her. (It reminded me of Gretchen Wiener sassing Regina George in "Mean Girls.")

My initial plans, upon arrival were to go out to a club to shake my a$$ tonight but I decided to relax in the house with my gorgeous family. We played Wii, cracked jokes and shared recent stories. And we spoke about the crazy chimpanzee in Stamford, CT. (I'm not going to get into this because I might slip a Xanax in your green tea and end up ripping my face off. Here's the link for the article, courtesy of the online edition of the Hartford Courant,0,1134122.story. In addition, take some time to hear/see the 911 call:

OH! I bought High School Musical 3 today.

It was sasstastic! I laughed, I danced, I cried and I want more. They should make "College Musical: Beer Pong Tournament." I just wanna grow up with Sharpay and Troy. I love them!

Speaking of love, I am so jealous of my friend Beverly. She's in Italy right now!

I was lucky enough to have been on AIM when she was online because I haven't spoken to her in quite a bit. She is in love with her study abroad program and I'm glad she's having an awesome time. Enjoy the rest of your trip Beverly! Can't wait to see you when you return.

Okay dukies, it's time for some "Words of Wisdom:"

"In times of stress its best to alleviate yourself of the situation as soon as possible. When you think you're rejuvenated enough, go back to the "stress" with a cleared head and you'll be able to create an effective remedy."

Its the moment you've been waiting for Vanessa. I know we haven't hung out much at all but I think you're fabulous. There better be an upcoming lunch or shopping date soon! Love you.

Duckies, I have to get my rest for tomorrow's adventures. I wish you the best of happiness. Stay true.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Land Before Sass

Hey duckies! I know it's been awhile. I've been going through so many A-list things that I should be in the hospital right now. (I can't wait for those days!) Anywho, for the past couple days the energy level on campus has been severely low.

Everyone is so lethargic and stressed. Plus, this slushy & sloppy weather isn't helping out. Junior year is so hard. I've discovered that my "spirit" is half of what it used to be. When I wasn't stressed (and extremely, extra happy) I always found dimes on the floor...always! Recently, I've only been finding nickels.

WTF is going on?

I miss those days when I didn't have to worry about much; the days before responsibilities sassed their way into my life.
Yesterday I was completing some homework and "The Land Before Time" was on.

How crazy is that? I wish I could go back and be eight years old and A-List again.

Nowadays, I have to keep up with celebrity feuds and stay on the President's List. It's just so hard. OH! NEWS UPDATE!

I decided to settle things with Skyler. It was a short celebrity feud but it was interesting, to say the least.

Thanks for being a part of my newest A-List feud, Skyler. Love you dude!

Speaking of love, I was up late the other night (trying to go to sleep) but "The Negotiator" was on. It's a movie starring Samuel L. Jackson and Kevin Spacey.

It is an incredible movie. I wanted to go to bed but every time I was ready to turn it off it would get even more titillating.

In regards to entertainment, comedian/magician Michael Kent...

performed at my school last night and it was priceless. He had me in hysterics. I couldn't control myself to the point that I was fumbling my BlackBerry and accidentally pressed the music button...and Beyonce's "Single Ladies" started playing, really loud!

But get this...he asked "Who's playing that song?" and started dancing to it. He started doing some of the choreography. Michael're so A-List and you don't even know it. I love you.
(If you want to check him out, here's his website link: and--you must log into Facebook before clicking on this link--you can become a fan by joining his Facebook fan page

Anywho, let's get to the daily "Words of Wisdom:"

"You are what you think. Think positive thoughts and only focus on that thought becoming better and better and your life will manifest around that vision. Positivity is the answer for everything. Think at your own risk, duckies."

Okay, my eyelids are trying to close down the shop. I wish you the best of happiness. Stay true.

Peace, love & Obama,
Gabriel Anderson